Portugal

And a good wind did come,

Pierre brought me to the trainstation nearby, when in 10 minutes i would be in Bordeaux where my Friends would pick me up,

to my utter surprise he did not gave me Money for the ride, saying that i could go illegally because they would never check on sunday's,  in the end i could not blame him because it was my life, my responsibility to have Money for the ride or Hitchhike if i had none,

but he was not a man of words , doing, rather than talking about the chosen path,so i was a little taken a back, but i could not hitchhike because the time was not in my favour, and so i rested my hope in that one train, if i could not make it in that one my friends had gone without me,

When i stood beside the train i saw a ticket woman coming towards me, and when i stepped inside she followed me, with beating heart i walked to a seat and sat down,,

The reason i do not like to be in a train without a ticket is not that they can put me in jail or give me a ticket,  but because i like trains, and i do not want to put a negative position on my presence there,
and you always must do what you want, or do not do what you do not want,

So the train woman came and wanted to see my ticket, i did what seemed best to me, i said that i had lost it and i searched my entire belongings untill the train ride was over, the train woman gave me time to look and eventually , under a explanation that she needed to come back with her boss, went away and i never saw her again.

so i came in bordeaux and saw them where we met,  so the journey could begin, Morgana, a woman of portuguese background but lived her whole live in the Netherlands, Jan, a German guy who was as gentle and softhearted that i did not know how to talk to him,
and Yoeha, their child, who was still a baby but could speak German, Dutch and portuguese,

This was not the first road trip i took in their company, the first time was to Polen,
The trip was in one day suceeded , the whole of spain in one day
, i can not find good words for that journey, only that i enjoyed it, a lot,

in the evening we ate pizza on portuguese ground, and yoeha was screaming that he wanted to go back to Spain, the little house we slept in had a nice fireplace and in the morning we climbed a Mountain,

Jan had the great idea to check the times of the bus going to Lisboa before going out to dinner, and so we found out that we had no time to go out for diner, and we said goodbye by the bus, they were paying for my ride and also gave me Money for Lisboa,

In Lisboa i could sleep for a few days, by the father of Morgana named Jo,
and it was really cool to meet him,

He was a crazy man, a energy wave the same as me,
we drank and walked drunk into supermarkts, played with nothingness and combined music with true dancing, tears flowed from my soul and we found each other in the clear insight of life,

believing in wonders,

after a week i felt the need of moving so i decided to hitchhike to the south of Portugal
I saw Morgana and Jan also again visiting Jo.

It took me 4 four days to hitchike to Lagos,

I spent new years eve under a tree , stuck by hitchiking,that day 3 friends with 2 cars picked me up, and they were going to a beach to spend the new year there, and i felt stupid that i did not go with them,but then again , i would have never got a ride with an ambulance with my full body intact
when i woke up, the ambulance thought i was dead and insisted in taking me to a café in the next town,

When i was there i got a free thea, and 3 pieces of cake,

Also i met a guy who wanted to bring me to his place to rest,
I said yes, but before we got there, we went into all the cafés along the way to celebrate 2015,

He was very  nice , and the next day i went to Lagos
When i had spend the night there on the beach i went to Villa de Bispo,  the beach was amazing and the nature splendid,

after a good dive i met Manuel, a swiss surfer who invited me to his place after he discovered that i was a genius,
he took me to a restaurant and we talked like old friends,

we hugged and said goodbye the next morning, my heart said to go back to Lisbon because i had my adventure
but he dropped me off at an hippie beach. I could not say no,

And the funny thing is that the first person i shook hands with, was also the person were i had a incredible story with, Sascha was his name and he travelled with his two best friends and a Spanish girl in a van , I wrote a poem for some of the people i met, and when Sascha was hearing it it was magic for him, because the poem was presisly saying the same thing as he was discussing with his friend, about letting go and live in the now,

Sascha and i were talking all day about our lives and the universe, growing to be comfortable with each other, We gathered wood for a fire and he showed me a cave in the mountains, to sleep in. I immediatly said that i wanted to sleep there, and so I slept there but not alone for Sascha joined me,

it was a nice cave with a beautiful view,
but first the fire,
When it was growing, we talked and had stories , and sooner or later the other people came from there cold vans to join us,

After a little while Sascha said goodbye and i went with him,
in the cave, he said what he felt,

as soon as the other people came to the fire he had this feeling that he needed to be some one else to be accepted, and he did not felt right, so he left

I said that nothing is more beautiful than being yourself and do not be afraid that they will discard you, for if you open up and light up your heart the people will embrace you, and love you,

there is no need to be afraid, for every human being has the right to be crazy, themselves, human, not okay, not perfect, for every human being need the others to find the words of meaning to his life,

he crepped closer and said, if this was to close, for he never had a father, and as  lonely child, he never had refferences, so i said "yes, this to close, but i do not mind, for that sentence you told from within, your true self was speaking so for me even if we are head to head, i do not feel awkward because if you need it  you are welcome to it,

i am not the one to disencourage you,"

As i was saying this, i put our heads together and afterwards he told me that he had felt a great power in my eyes, i said " that are my eyes , challenging you to be yourself,  , he felt something in his heart but was confronted by his mind that said to not do it,
Always follow your heart,

So he kissed me,
and i answered, taking by surprise,

We laughed in each other arms, he asked me how i felt, i answered that i felt the happiest person in the world, not because i liked the kiss, it felt wrong in my whole body and i feared that he wanted to go further, but because i was there to accept his need for a inner outburst,

i said to him that it was a good expirience, nothing more, and he agreed, his heart was pounding in his body, and that is a good sign,

i left that morning without asking him, why he kissed me. If he found me attractive, which i doubt, if he saw in me a father figure where he wanted to be closer to, or just for the expirience.

So i kissed a man before i kissed a woman, me, the female chaser, it was good, well not the kiss,

Why i did it?
To be there for a person who needed this opening up, i do no know if we talked enough about the moment for him to have any effect on his further life, i doubt it, but he is a gentle soul, and i hope it,

Why i say this to you?
Because, this is a lesson,
about being free, do not be afraid, be there for the other person, even if it breaks your boundaries, and listen.

After wards i went back to Lisboa , i had enough adventure

On the road a woman who picked me up needed, some help with her water bottles, so i helped.
talking explained that she had a agriculture farm with her husband and two kids,

I asked if i could sleep at their place, and help when help was needed,
she accepted and i helped cutting wood, mixing cement, and making chutney.
It was great to meet them, and when i heard she was making Seitan, i could not resist asking if i could stay for dinner the next day,

Her husband was very charming and she was a very good cook, and gentle

When i left i got a kiss on my mouth from the oldest daughter who was 3,

my heart broke,
they all hugged me, and i was on the road again,
I was near Granola when i got picked up by a couple who went straight to Lisboa,

they dropped me off at a trainstation,
never telling them , i had no Money for the train, they left me there,

after awhile i walked away, and stopped, to look around,
some businessmen asked me if they could help me, when they heard that i was going to Benfica, they had pity for me and brought me in their car,,

i say to you, the nicest car ever that picked me up throughout my journey.
a crazy blond girl was driving, worked for  japanese computer company,  they had no time for a poem but i wrote them my email and stuff and would write a poem of a crazy blond girl with the nice car,

Jo was not there but his neighbour invited me in, giving me cookies and a half bottle of port for the night,  i slept behind garbage

i met a street jugglar, a living statue woman who gave me a flower and i met a dancer who said that i could dance any time with him because he felt really happy when he danced with me on the streets.

I wrote 3 poems for lonely people my feet took me to,

and i went to play in a kids playground
oo yeahh and once i saw a girl, sensually dancing on the street, and i joined her, she was smiling and together we made a beautiful love tale, we got a big croud and clapping in the end,


and i have learned that , sometimes, as i grow older and as i travel farther, there are some people who think that they have nothing to teach me anymore, so they leave me in peace.

But a person is forever learning and i am forever eager to learn and it was quite a problem for me to meet persons in their own habitat who thought i was Mature and thinking in the same way, and theirby seeing my problems as a problem.
A problem, not for them to have a hand in fixing


So deciding that i did not need people at this time,
i needed to have time on my own, once again

i began to walk from Lissabon to Barcelona,
Yes, my feet never got the change to bring me by themselves but that is because i cannot say no if someone wants to give me a ride

50 kilometers from Lissabon there were friends from my parents,
distant friends were i walked by,
and had a great time,

Then i walked again, and stole Oranges from the trees everywhere i walked,

in the beginning it was easy, then it became hard and then it was magnificent

In 6 days i walked 200 kilometres,
I would not put my thumb out to get a ride but if some people just stop to take me anyway,
who am i to say no

Money was something i did not wanted to use,
it was a shame that i bought myself icecream, bread and pinutbutter,

i never needed it
because on my second day,
a portugese guy took me and brought me home,

always speaking portugese, he was dropping me off at his house
and decided that i was very cool
he wanted to open up and to tell me his hard life,

with many hours passing and many gestures later we came to the conclusion that life sucked sometimes,
or as he putted it "c'est la vie" (That is life)

But he showed me quite the opposite, as he stuffed my backpack so much with food that i had enought food for 6 days,

With an entire fish in my belly, i walked again,
making a little 40 kilometres every day,

at one point, i even ran alongside the road for 1 kilometre, got picked up and got a tour of a beautiful city,

not wanting to spend days city seeing, i just went again, and walked,

a guy wanted to make a picture of me, after receiving a poem from me,
he was so happy that i almost felt bad that i did not walk all the way to Barcelona,

But my feet were so damn happy,

After the 200 kilometres, a woman stopped for me, and i said yes,
she was going to Madrid, and i was glad as hell

i did not want to cheat on my mission, of walking all the way, but Madrid was still pretty far off from Barcelona, so i said, what the heck

it was silent in the car, and when we spoke, we spoke about the radio and Cd's

that was great, but i did not got the feeling that we bonded,

but i was wrong, totally wrong,

for when we arrived, she did not possible wanted to consider letting me loose, on a crazy walking trip to Barcelona,

so she let me stay by her mother and paid,( yes, paid) my train ticket to Barcelona
singing Happy birthday to me when i woke up for guess what

it was my birthday


She is a woman who is always in my heart, from then and there,
my greatest dream came true, and i cried and laughed , at the same time, when i sat on the train,
and not very soft, but wild, like a crazy man

it was my fucking birthday and that is a very great fucking day,